16 Ways to Piss Off Any Texan

10. Visit Taco Bell

If you find yourself in the great state of tacos, do yourself and your taste buds a favor, and visit a real taco place. On pretty much every corner in the state, you can find an amazing taco truck, shack, hole-in-the-wall, or restaurant that will have the most delicious tacos you’ve ever tasted. One visit, and they’ll have you saying “No quiero Taco Bell.”


9. Invite Us to a “BBQ” When It’s Clearly Not

As Texans, we eat, live, and breathe BBQ. In fact, we have entire festivals dedicated to the competitive sport of BBQ. But let’s get one thing straight. There is a difference between this:

hot dogs rainy day

and this:


One is real, true BBQ that involves all things delicious like: smoked brisket, turkey, sausage, ribs, and chicken. The other, while still good, is best suited for a kid’s birthday party.


8. Complain About the Heat

We realize you’re used to your “seasons” and your “summer” peaking out somewhere around 88 degrees, but around here, we pack the real heat. When you get hit with 100 consecutive days of 100+ degree weather, then we’ll talk.

Anything for Selenas shirt

7. Give us A Mr. Pibb When We Ask for Dr Pepper


This seems self-explanatory, but it seems we still have to explain. Mr. Pibb is NOT the same as Dr Pepper. Neither is Dr Thunder or any other knock off. Though most of them start with formal titles and even kind of (if you close one eye and look sideways) look the same, they’re just not. One is a Dr for goodness sake! I prefer my soda to have an education.


6. Serve us Melted Cheese When We Asked for Queso

We get that the literal Spanish to English translation of “queso” is “cheese”, but that’s not all Texas Queso is, and we’d go to the mattresses for it. In Texas, queso means cheese PLUS a whole lot of other glorious things like ground beef, guacamole, pico, and jalapenos – just to name a few. So get that plain melted cheese out of our faces.

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